trying for some perspective

i appear to have killed most of my tomatoes.
it started out that they were looking a little yellow around the ears. last sunday i took them outside, doused them with fish emulsion and let them experience the outdoors.

i brought them in at dusk and thought—oh my. more shriveled, more yellow.
that was several days ago, they don't appear to be getting much better.

too much fertilizer? too much sun? too much cold?
or is it the mold on the outside of the peat pots?

devastation, tears, guilt—the whole why me?! act. it took me a few hours to calm down.

to counteract that self-imposed sense of woe i thought i might muse on all the things going right this season. yesterday i took a look around and was pleasantly surprised.

outside the spinach is coming up well—which is a first for me. perhaps the warm-turned-cold spring is helping me out on that. the carrots, beets and arugula are also up in a nice form and the neighbor's potatoes are looking healthy. the black raspberries in back are doing good, as is the gooseberry bush. my flower pots are living and sprouting and i see poppies on the way.

not to mention that i have one full rain barrel!

inside the peppers are making up for the tomatoes and look amazing. as do the squash and melons. better yet, the once-thought-for-dead cabbage are looking good and will be thriving outside soon. the sweet potatoes in the kitchen are beginning to sprout.

my dog is healthy, my cats are happy and everyone living in the house seems to be having a good time.

the first farmer's market is this saturday and i am planning on bicycling down and loading up with seasonal foods, flowers and maybe some tomato plants. as was pointed out to me, i will have a garden this year, it might just not all be grown from (my) seed.

so i will move on to bigger concerns—like why isn't it above 50 at night yet?!